The traditional Orthodox commemoration of the departed takes place on the third, ninth, fortieth day. This is followed by an annual commemoration on the day of death. On all memorial days, it is necessary to conduct a special ritual that helps the deceased to pass from the material world to the spiritual. The Church believes that until the fortieth day, the soul is between the worlds. The third memorial day is a funeral, the ninth day is a prayer for the tranquility of the soul, the fortieth ritual is a farewell to eternity.
It is necessary
- - memorial prayer ceremony at the grave;
- - prayer ceremony in the church;
- - charity;
- - memorial dinner.
On the third day, when the funeral takes place, everyone who wants to come. Usually friends, relatives, acquaintances, colleagues, neighbors come. In general, all those who knew the deceased.
Organize a commemoration after the funeral. Put on the memorial table kutya made of cereals or millet with raisins, honey or sugar, pancakes, jelly, noodle soup with chicken, a main course, sweets, cookies, apples. For all those leaving the commemoration, bring sweets, cookies and a handkerchief with you.
On the ninth and fortieth day, invite only the closest relatives of the deceased. Do not bring the brought flowers and wreaths into the house, install them immediately in the cemetery. Be sure to invite a priest to perform the memorial prayer. To do this, attach the icon of the Savior to the tombstone. The icon should not be next to the photograph of the deceased, so if you are installing a photograph, then fix it on the fence.
After visiting the cemetery, order a ritual commemoration at the church. Put down the candles for peace. Give to all the poor and the poor. You can serve cookies, candy, and, if possible, supplies.
Memorial prayers and alms are the most important ritual performed on the ninth day and the fortieth day. The memorial dinner should be prepared with simple dishes. Do not put any delicacies on the table. Obligatory dishes are kutia made from cereals or grain with raisins, pancakes and jelly or compote. All other dishes can be set at your discretion.
Alcohol-containing drinks help the living to alleviate the pain of loss, but their use has nothing to do with a memorial rite. The use of vodka at memorial dinners came from pagan rituals, so you can put alcohol or not on the table, the church does not prohibit it, but it does not approve either.
If you remember a person who never believed in God and did not turn to the Temple during his lifetime, still hold memorial prayers and rituals. This will help the "lost" soul to calm down and move from one dimension to another. Pray for an unbaptized and unbelieving person on your own at home, since the ROC does not conduct rituals for funeral services and commemoration of unbaptized and suicides.
After the ritual commemoration, you must keep the memory in your soul, systematically visit the grave on parental days. It doesn't matter how rich you make the decoration of the grave, the main thing is that it is always cleaned and prayer rites of remembrance are performed on it.